Mer
posted by Ginger Gibbon at 12:26 AM
0 comments
Monday, February 05, 2007
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Friday, August 18, 2006
First day of work
Todays the day i start my new job. After about 7 months of unemployment, and 12 months since i left school, i'm finally doing something with myself! Something i can be proud of. I am working in McDonalds. Now i say that with a hint of sarcasm in my voice, and by a "hint" i mean "a lot" and by "sarcasm" i mean "burning anger."
I wake up at 11, proceed with the regular routine; have a shit, have a shower and get changed into my uniform. By this time its 11:45, so my Mum generously gives me a lift to work. Mint.
I get there for 12, clock in, put my stuff in my locker, wash my hands and go into the kitchen. I ask one of the managers what i have to do and she doesn't seem very happy. She sends me to the chicken section to work over there. I learned a few of the basics of what i had to do on my induction, which happened to be 8am on my birthday, which was almost a month ago (July 21).
I say hello to this girl i'm working with and she seems rather nice. We talk, she asks me what i know and i tell her not alot. One of the managers (a big homosexual asian guy) tells her to look after me.
Suddenly orders start coming in, and the girl i'm working with starts making a deli or something like that, and i'm forced to work on my own. The hag which i mentioned earlier (The one which didn't seem awfully pleased the fact a TRAINEE on his first real day didn't know what to do) shouted "RICHARD!!! McCHICKEN SANDWICH!!!"
Now don't panic, i remember, you have the crown (the top of the bun) and the hoove (you guessed it, the bottom of the bun). Now you put the crown in the top part of the case and you put one dollop of the sandwich sauce onto it, then you sprinkle lettuce onto it and put the patty onto that and then the hoove on that. Turn it upside down, and VOILA! A half decent McChicken sandwich.
Now that bitch had been watching me the whole time. She came over to me and shouted
"YOU HAVEN'T TOASTED THE BUN, WHY DIDN'T YOU TOAST THE BUN"
"Sorry, i remembered the rest of how to make it, but i haven't been showed how to use the toaster yet at all and didn't realise you actually had to toast it beforehand"
"HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU HAD A NON TOASTED BUN WHEN YOU'VE BEEN TO McDONALDS HUH? YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEY WERE TOASTED IF YOU'VE EATEN IN McDONALDS BEFORE!!!"
I sing a little song in my head and start again. Here is a perfect example of stuck up managers who cannot only not admit that they are wrong, but also can't admit there misunderstood! She is around 30 years old, bleached blonde hair, that bitchy aura around her, one of those faces which looks as though shes sucking a lemon (if you can see past her 2 inch thich makeup), and not only that, SHE'S A MANAGER AT A SMALL MCDONALDS RESTAURANT IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKIN NOWHERE!!! No offence to people who are of course, and thats not just because i don't want to offend certain people, its because it genuinely is a pretty good job. But if any of you cunts try to act as authority over me in a way similar to slut here, i would give you the misfortune of having my foot in your ass.
After that i made a few more things, did a few more do's and didn't a few more daniel bedingfield. Every two seconds she was looking over my shoulder, making stupid comments making me realise how much more intelligent i am than the person telling me what to do (i don't give a shit if you think thats boasting, i'm not saying i'm intelligent i'm saying i'm much more intelligent than that bitch and i don't care if thats biased and ignorant saying that about somebody i've only met today).
After about an hour i got into the swing of things and in my opinion i think i learned pretty fast (working in McDonalds is harder than people let on). Diseased features asks for
"SIX PACKS OF FOUR [nuggets] AND TWO PACKS OF SIX QUICKLY RICHARD!!!"
I set off to box them up, i open the tray and its full of McNuggets, starting with the sixes which she quickly snatches as i close the box and onto the fours. This whole time cockjockey hadn't took her eyes off me, although she managed to walk around the room and interact with others with ease. I made five of the packs of four and there was only two nuggets left. I say to her
"There are no nuggets left in the tray shall i cook some more?"
She walks round the counter
"HURRY UP AND MAKE THESE NUGGETS QUICK"
"I just said that there are only two nuggets left"
"WELL COME ON THEN COOK SOME MORE QUICK"
"I just ASKED if i should cook some more!"
"THERES NO NEED TO GET SNAPPY"
"I'm not getting snappy, its just the fact i did ask whether i should and you ignored me and now your shouting at me for it"
"THERE IS NO NEED TO GET SNAPPY, WE HAVE FUN AND ARE NICE TO EACH OTHER HERE!"
"I'm not getting snappy, i'm talking logical, i told you there weren't any left and asked whether i should cook some more, of which you most definately paid attention too as you stared at me while i said it and you walked round towards me. Then you informed me that there was no nuggets. I informed you that i just told you that, and enquired whether i should cook some more. So what i'm saying is me speaking sense, not me being snappy"
"K."
She walked off. I went on my break about 30 minutes after that, and when i got back the hooker had gone. I think she had a dick sucking appointment but i'm not sure, it'll probably end up as full on sex with that filthy slag anyway.
As i left too go into the staff room the big gay asian guy started talking to this guy in a "I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU TALKING I'M STANDING TWO FEET AWAY FROM YOU" kind of tone. I overheard pot... mint. I opened the door slower than usual to hear what they were saying, thinking they were secret lunchtime stoners and maybe i could have a smoke one of the days.
"DON'T GET SMOKING POT AT DINNER"
"What?"
"ARE YOU A STONER? DO YOU SMOKE POT?"
I should really add he didn't say this in a nasty way, he was giggling like i regularly wet the bed or something!
"I'm not going to say i haven't smoked it!"
"STONER!!! DON'T SMOKE POT AT LUNCH!!!"
I had some nuggets for dinner, went up the shop and brought a bottle of boost and some fags. Rang one of my mates and smoked three fags in that process (i had another 5 hours of work ahead with no breaks what do you expect?).
After whore went the day ran smooth, no problems to really, i finished at 8 and met up with Luke, SMOKED SOME POT LOL!!1 and kicked back in an alley. My, aren't i a chav?
So don't get a job at McDonalds, k? K. cuz itz shit.
I wake up at 11, proceed with the regular routine; have a shit, have a shower and get changed into my uniform. By this time its 11:45, so my Mum generously gives me a lift to work. Mint.
I get there for 12, clock in, put my stuff in my locker, wash my hands and go into the kitchen. I ask one of the managers what i have to do and she doesn't seem very happy. She sends me to the chicken section to work over there. I learned a few of the basics of what i had to do on my induction, which happened to be 8am on my birthday, which was almost a month ago (July 21).
I say hello to this girl i'm working with and she seems rather nice. We talk, she asks me what i know and i tell her not alot. One of the managers (a big homosexual asian guy) tells her to look after me.
Suddenly orders start coming in, and the girl i'm working with starts making a deli or something like that, and i'm forced to work on my own. The hag which i mentioned earlier (The one which didn't seem awfully pleased the fact a TRAINEE on his first real day didn't know what to do) shouted "RICHARD!!! McCHICKEN SANDWICH!!!"
Now don't panic, i remember, you have the crown (the top of the bun) and the hoove (you guessed it, the bottom of the bun). Now you put the crown in the top part of the case and you put one dollop of the sandwich sauce onto it, then you sprinkle lettuce onto it and put the patty onto that and then the hoove on that. Turn it upside down, and VOILA! A half decent McChicken sandwich.
Now that bitch had been watching me the whole time. She came over to me and shouted
"YOU HAVEN'T TOASTED THE BUN, WHY DIDN'T YOU TOAST THE BUN"
"Sorry, i remembered the rest of how to make it, but i haven't been showed how to use the toaster yet at all and didn't realise you actually had to toast it beforehand"
"HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU HAD A NON TOASTED BUN WHEN YOU'VE BEEN TO McDONALDS HUH? YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEY WERE TOASTED IF YOU'VE EATEN IN McDONALDS BEFORE!!!"
I sing a little song in my head and start again. Here is a perfect example of stuck up managers who cannot only not admit that they are wrong, but also can't admit there misunderstood! She is around 30 years old, bleached blonde hair, that bitchy aura around her, one of those faces which looks as though shes sucking a lemon (if you can see past her 2 inch thich makeup), and not only that, SHE'S A MANAGER AT A SMALL MCDONALDS RESTAURANT IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKIN NOWHERE!!! No offence to people who are of course, and thats not just because i don't want to offend certain people, its because it genuinely is a pretty good job. But if any of you cunts try to act as authority over me in a way similar to slut here, i would give you the misfortune of having my foot in your ass.
After that i made a few more things, did a few more do's and didn't a few more daniel bedingfield. Every two seconds she was looking over my shoulder, making stupid comments making me realise how much more intelligent i am than the person telling me what to do (i don't give a shit if you think thats boasting, i'm not saying i'm intelligent i'm saying i'm much more intelligent than that bitch and i don't care if thats biased and ignorant saying that about somebody i've only met today).
After about an hour i got into the swing of things and in my opinion i think i learned pretty fast (working in McDonalds is harder than people let on). Diseased features asks for
"SIX PACKS OF FOUR [nuggets] AND TWO PACKS OF SIX QUICKLY RICHARD!!!"
I set off to box them up, i open the tray and its full of McNuggets, starting with the sixes which she quickly snatches as i close the box and onto the fours. This whole time cockjockey hadn't took her eyes off me, although she managed to walk around the room and interact with others with ease. I made five of the packs of four and there was only two nuggets left. I say to her
"There are no nuggets left in the tray shall i cook some more?"
She walks round the counter
"HURRY UP AND MAKE THESE NUGGETS QUICK"
"I just said that there are only two nuggets left"
"WELL COME ON THEN COOK SOME MORE QUICK"
"I just ASKED if i should cook some more!"
"THERES NO NEED TO GET SNAPPY"
"I'm not getting snappy, its just the fact i did ask whether i should and you ignored me and now your shouting at me for it"
"THERE IS NO NEED TO GET SNAPPY, WE HAVE FUN AND ARE NICE TO EACH OTHER HERE!"
"I'm not getting snappy, i'm talking logical, i told you there weren't any left and asked whether i should cook some more, of which you most definately paid attention too as you stared at me while i said it and you walked round towards me. Then you informed me that there was no nuggets. I informed you that i just told you that, and enquired whether i should cook some more. So what i'm saying is me speaking sense, not me being snappy"
"K."
She walked off. I went on my break about 30 minutes after that, and when i got back the hooker had gone. I think she had a dick sucking appointment but i'm not sure, it'll probably end up as full on sex with that filthy slag anyway.
As i left too go into the staff room the big gay asian guy started talking to this guy in a "I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU TALKING I'M STANDING TWO FEET AWAY FROM YOU" kind of tone. I overheard pot... mint. I opened the door slower than usual to hear what they were saying, thinking they were secret lunchtime stoners and maybe i could have a smoke one of the days.
"DON'T GET SMOKING POT AT DINNER"
"What?"
"ARE YOU A STONER? DO YOU SMOKE POT?"
I should really add he didn't say this in a nasty way, he was giggling like i regularly wet the bed or something!
"I'm not going to say i haven't smoked it!"
"STONER!!! DON'T SMOKE POT AT LUNCH!!!"
I had some nuggets for dinner, went up the shop and brought a bottle of boost and some fags. Rang one of my mates and smoked three fags in that process (i had another 5 hours of work ahead with no breaks what do you expect?).
After whore went the day ran smooth, no problems to really, i finished at 8 and met up with Luke, SMOKED SOME POT LOL!!1 and kicked back in an alley. My, aren't i a chav?
So don't get a job at McDonalds, k? K. cuz itz shit.
posted by Ginger Gibbon at 12:16 AM
0 comments
